Kam's Kapsules by Kam Williams
The Alamo (PG-13 for sustained, intense battle sequences). This latest account of the 13-day battle for the famous San Antonio fort features Billy Bob Thornton as Davy Crockett, Jason Patric as Jim Bowie, and Dennis Quaid as General Sam Houston.
The Barbarian Invasions (R for profanity, sex chat, and drug use). This Best Foreign Film Oscar-winner revolves around a womanizing professor who is now divorced, cancer ridden and attempting to reconcile with his ex-wife, his son, several mistresses, and old friends. In French with subtitles.
Dawn of the Dead (R for profanity, sexuality, and pervasive gory violence). Remake of the creepy 1978 screamfest about survivors of a zombie-producing plague who barricade themselves in a shopping mall. With Ving Rhames, Mekhi Phifer and Sarah Polley.
Ella Enchanted (PG for crude humor and mild epithets). It's Cinderella revisited in this screen adaptation of the Newberry Award-winning young adult novel of the same name by Gail Carson Levine. Fantasy revolves around Ella (Anne Hathaway), an otherwise obedient girl out to thwart her evil stepmother's plan to marry-off one of her own daughters to a charming prince.
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (R for sex, expletives, and drug use). Romantic comedy with Kate Winslet and Jim Carrey as a couple who try to save their struggling relationship by undergoing a procedure which is supposed to erase only their bad memories of each other. With Kirsten Dunst, Mark Ruffalo and Elijah Wood.
The Girl Next Door (R for profanity, nudity, explicit sexual content, and drug and alcohol use). Escapist teen fantasy about a nerdy high school senior (Emile Hirsch) whose seductive new neighbor turns out to be a porn star (Elisha Cuthbert).
Girl with a Pearl Earring (PG-13 for sex content). Scarlett Johansson stars as the title character of this 17th century costume drama, based on the Tracy Chevalier novel of the same name, which speculates about the anonymous subject of the famous Vermeer painting of the same name.
Goodbye Lenin! (R for profanity and sexuality). A collapse of Communism comedy about a Western-leaning, political agitator who decides to hide the fact that the Berlin Wall has fallen from his dyed-in-the-wool, pinko mother who is bed-ridden with a heart problem. In German with subtitles.
Hellboy (PG-13 for supernatural violence and frightening images). Adapted from Seed of Destruction, the first in the Hellboy series of graphic novels by Mike Mignola, this sci-fi flick revolves around a demonic superhero created as a result of a 1944 Nazi experiment gone wrong.
Home on the Range (PG for rude humor). Disney animated adventure about a bunch of bovines who hatch a plan to save themselves from being shipped to a meat-packing plant. Voicework provided by Dame Judi Dench, Roseanne, Cuba Gooding, Steve Buscemi, and Jennifer Tilly.
Jersey Girl (PG-13 for profanity and sexual content). Kevin Smith's bittersweet dramedy about the ill-fated, whirlwind romance of a workaholic music promoter (Ben Affleck) and a N.Y.C. book editor (Jennifer Lopez).
Johnson Family Vacation (PG-13 for crude humor, sexual references, and drug use). Raucous road comedy stars Cedric the Entertainer as the exasperated patriarch of a family facing a series of misadventures on its annual trek halfway cross the country to a family reunion. With Vanessa Williams, Steve Harvey, Solange Knowles, Lil Bow Wow, and Shannon Elizabeth.
The Ladykillers (R for profanity and sexual references). Coen Bros. remake of the 1955 crime comedy stars Tom Hanks as a professor-turned-gang leader who decides to try to rubout his landlady after she gets wind of his plans to rob a New Orleans riverboat casino.
Monseiur Ibrahim (R for sexual content). Adapted from the historical novel by Eric-Emmanuel Schmitt, this morality play, set in Paris in the 1960s, revolves around the heartwarming relationship between an elderly Arab deli owner and a 13-year old Jewish kid called Momo. In French with subtitles.
The Passion of the Christ (R for graphic violence). Devout Catholic Mel Gibson's long-awaited, arguably anti-Semitic, re-enactment of the last 12 hours in the life of Christ, starring Jim Caviezel as Jesus, Monica Belucci as Mary Magdalene, and Rosalinda Celentano as the Devil incarnate.
The Prince and Me (PG for some sex-related references and mild epithets). Cinderalla style fairy tale starring Julia Stiles as a motorcycle-riding, pre-med student who falls in love with a rebellious classmate (Luke Mably), unaware that he's actually the Prince of Denmark. With Miranda Richardson as the Queen Mother.
Scooby-Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed (PG for scary sequences and rude humor). Another live action-animated mix adaptation of the TV cartoon series with Freddie Prinze, Jr. and Sarah Michelle Gellar reprising their roles as Fred and Daphne, respectively. The Great Dane detective and crew tackle the case of the anonymous masked crook who is trying to take over the city of Coolsville with a monster making machine.
Secret Window (PG-13 for violence, terror, sex content, and expletives). Johnny Depp stars in this adaptation of a Stephen King horror story about a writer being stalked by a stranger (John Turturro) who is accusing him of plagiarism. With Charles Dutton and Timothy Hutton.
Starsky & Hutch (PG-13 for drug use, profanity, violence, nudity, and sexual situations). Perennial buddies Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson make their sixth film together, a tongue-in-cheek, retro adaptation of the popular TV show which enjoyed a five-year run from 1975-79. Supporting cast includes Snoop Dogg, Vince Vaughn, Juliette Lewis, Carmen Electra, and Amy Smart.
Taking Lives (R for sex, violence, disturbing images, and profane language). Angelina Jolie stars in this adaptation of the 1999 Michael Pye novel about an FBI profiler sent to Canada to track down the slippery serial killer who assumes the identity of his victims. With Ethan Hawke, Gena Rowlands, and Kiefer Sutherland.
Walking Tall (PG-13 for sex, intense violence, drug use, and profanity). Remake of the 1973 film based on the real-life exploits of Tennessee Sheriff Buford Pusser. New and improved version casts The Rock as a cop cleaning up a remote town in rural Washington with a 4 foot-long 4-by-4.
The Whole Ten Yards (PG-13 for sex, expletives, and violence). A half-dozen, principal cast members from The Whole Nine Yards return for another round of Mafia meets suburbia mayhem, including Bruce Willis, Matthew Perry, and Amanda Peet.